NOW HIRING: a job opportunity


Please pass the word around. We are trying to fill this position asap.

JOB NOTICE

Title: Repetitive Inquiry Respondent

Responsibilities: Be available 24 hours a day to answer random and unending questions, such as "Do dragons poop while they are flying?" and "Why do we need to eat food every day?", so that parental figure can have a cohesive thought and complete menial daily tasks within their home environment


Skills Needed: a general and thorough knowledge of EVERYTHING IN THE WORLD, including but not limited to cars, trucks, dinosaurs, superheroes, lasers, pirates, monsters, and bank robbers.

Benefits: the satisfaction prolonging the life of a certain four-year-old and his mother

Salary: today I will pay any amount requested to stop answering these questions. (generosity of boss subject to change without notice.)

TO APPLY, leave a comment with the answer to the following question:

Why do Superman and Batman wear capes, but not Spiderman?



8 comments:

  1. Anonymous5:55 PM

    first time commenter, but love reading your blog
    but i feel the answer is: because the cape gets in the way of spiderman's climbing abilities

    ReplyDelete
  2. ok... "Anonymous" can't get the prize because we don't know who the person is.

    So... coming from ME... DIANE...

    I think the answer is because the cape gets in the way of spiderman's climbing abilities.

    Brillant answer.

    What was MY prize again?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous10:09 PM

    Anonymous is Crystal B. a college student with nothing better to do durring finals then figure out such answer,
    -Crystal B.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I don't have any answers, because of my 3 year old. If you get a surplus of worthy answerers, send one my way.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Because spiders don't wear capes so why would a spider-man?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Anonymous11:55 AM

    Superman and Batman can fly on their own and it provides some sort of balance. Spiderman has his webs that help him move from one place to the other, so technically he's not really flying.
    Anna, a nanny who attends OCC! Good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  7. The "Why ...?" and the "How come...?" questions have threatened to put me into a psychotic break. I have concluded the only appropriate answer to be:

    Because that's the way it is.


    (I answer EVERYTHING with that. No, you don't have to thank me.)

    ReplyDelete
  8. Anonymous11:55 PM

    ummmm . . . it's because all that sticky goo that comes out of his fingers would ger goop all over a cape and it then the cape would stick to his hair . . .
    Oh never mind . . . I don't want this job . . .
    I ALREADY HAD THIS JOB WHEN YOU WERE FOUR YEARS OLD!!!!
    Still love ya anyway!! Mom

    ReplyDelete

talk to me.

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