bittersweet birthday the third

Today was a hard day. Today, both Keanan and India turn three years old. Each of the last three birthdays has been hard, but this one was particularly difficult. On their first birthdays, I thought for sure that we would celebrate #2 together. Last year, I was certain he would be home by three. Today, I just don't know what to think anymore. Last year I described this day as bittersweet. Today I am just feeling bitter.
I'm sure it didn't help that we didn't really have any birthday festivities for India to take my mind off of things. We are celebrating her birthday with a few friends on Saturday, and going to Disney on Friday, so today was really mellow. It was also low-key because I pretended that it wasn't her birthday. Because my four-year-old likes to tattle more than Matt Damon in The Informant. And because I want to squeak in one last "free under three" day at Disney before we have to spring for India's annual pass. So mum's the word on the birthday front until we pass through the front gate at D-Land.
You know what is almost as bad as Keanan not being home? (Okay, nothing is almost that bad. I'm just using hyperbole here. And I'm about to talk about poop. Put down your lunch): India is three and still not potty-trained. Sure, she wears undies and attends preschool and fools the world, but every day around 2pm, she craps her pants. I catch it in time to put her in a diaper most days. Today, I did not. I've been trying to psyche her up all month by saying things about how, when she is three, she will deposit her poops into the toilet. I guess today she wanted to show me, in a rather explosive way, that she is not so keen on that idea. So. She really showed me.
And because misery loves company, I'm actually posting a photo of the mess. It is here. YOU SHOULD NOT CLICK ON THAT. It is a vile and disgusting photo of toddler poop. But when you do click on that, just so I get the maximum amount of sympathy, know that I snapped that photo after already cleaning about half of it up. Notice the feet, people. Notice the feet . . . and then think about what the hallway looked like when she walked out of her room. What you can't see in this picture is that she is actually saying "cheese" and smiling proudly, like the whole thing is one big joke. One big joke that I am still cleaning out of her room. (This is the part where I decide not to make a joke about her $h!t-eating grin, because that would be in poor taste. And if there is one thing I want to avoid more than anything, it's doing something in poor taste. Obviously).

Well, I've now gone from debbie downer to poop poster, and I'm not sure why anyone would still be reading, but if you stuck it out, there's a prize at the end. Here is a really, really adorable video of Keanan's friends singing happy birthday to him at the boy's home. Precious. Truly.


  1. Happy Birthday to your two sweets! And I can feel your pain with the potty training. I've only potty trained one child and he was 3 AND A HALF before we had ANY success with ANY OF IT!!!! That day (March 22, 2006) was my PROUDEST moment when I got my son to use the potty. I'm not kidding Kristen, I cried a little for being so proud. (He'd been in preschool for almost a year.)

    Anyway, hang in there!

  2. Happy Birthday India and Keanan! That photo was truly gross. I'm so thankful we're past that stage! Caleb did that in Sunday school once. He wasn't wearing a diaper...I had no clean clothes for him....

  3. Wow, all of that is really horrible. Keanan not being home is worst, but the poop... is pretty bad.

  4. Oh, dude. I was NOT going to click on the poop. But then I thought, she MUST be joking. Because she would not REALLY post the poop. And then I CLICKED ON THE POOP. F*&^%^)CK! WHAT ARE YOU FEEDING THAT KID???!!!! STOP!!!!!!!!!!!

    Start giving her cheese. LOTS and LOTS of cheese. BIND THAT GIRL UP.

    Holy crackers, Batman, that was disgusting. You have my everlasting sympathy. And I should have no trouble sticking to my diet now. Thank you.

    PS. My kid is 5 years and 5 months, and he still pees his pants at kindergarten 50% of the time. No amount of bribery, punishing, or anything else is working. I'm starting to think the boy needs a urologist.

    PS Again. I have no words re: Keanan, honey. Nothing I can say can make it better. He should be here. I'm sorry he's not. I love you.

  5. You told us not to click. Why did I click?

    On the other hand, so sorry this is such a crummy day for you. I don't think anything anyone can say will make it better. But try and enjoy the birthday festivities with your not-exactly-free-under-three! I know India brings a lot of joy to your life every day (when she is not explosively pooping all over the place).Do celebrate her too!

  6. And P.S. A Very Happy Birthday to "the twins!"

  7. I too have a nearly 3 year old who WILL.NOT.POOP.IN.THE.TOILET.


    On a happy note, I saw your fam in the Show Hope newsletter today! You are famous! Happy birthday to the kiddos!

  8. For the last 2 weeks my daughter has decided not to be bowel trained. So frustrating. She just walks over and tells me "I did something naughty." Grrr!

  9. I had a 3 yr old "I'm not going to use the bathroom", kid, too!! Mine was lacking some motivation... so as soon as he had one success and I KNEW, KNEW, KNEW he could do it, we took away ALL sweets.... LOL

    I now have a "pretty much/on most days" trained almost 4 yr old... and I am thankful:)

    Thanks for your video of your precious one in Haiti!! What a sweet bunch of boys!


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