That's what SHE said: marital threats, black moms and the race talk, pregnancy disclosure, and more . . .


The 9 Most Overlooked Threats To A Marriage | Kelly M. Flanagan
It’s a lifetime that forms us into people who are becoming ever more loving versions of ourselves, who can bear the weight of loneliness, who have released the weight of shame, who have traded in walls for bridges, who have embraced the mess of being alive, who risk empathy and forgive disappointments, who love everyone with equal fervor, who give and take and compromise, and who have dedicated themselves to a lifetime of presence and awareness and attentiveness.

Black Moms Tell White Moms About The Race Talk, Parents Talk Back | Uexpress
The mothers talked about the times their sons had been stopped in their own neighborhoods because “they fit the description.” They shared the times their sons had come home full of rage and hurt for being stopped and questioned for no reason. And they told the other mothers how often they told their sons to simply swallow the injustice of the moment. Because they wanted them alive, above all.




Right now, my son knows nothing of race. If you ask him what color Mommy and Daddy are, he’ll say “green” or “orange” or “blue,” naming the color of whatever shirts we’re wearing. But if nothing changes, it won’t be long before we have to sit him down for a conversation that I dread: the one where we tell him that the rules may be different for him than for his white friends; the one where we tell him that, if the cops bust him and his buddies for smoking pot, he can’t count on being treated the same as everybody else; the one where we tell him that white kids generally don’t get shot just because they’re not perfect citizens, but black kids sometimes do.

My Failure, White Christians, And Unintentional Racism | Beyond The Picket Fence Dream
My point: the white Christian Western church has built a reputation for loving people around the globe and ignoring people sleeping on their doorstep (or anyone not inside their doors on Sunday morning). There are opportunities to connect with and learn from cultures all around us. It is often uncomfortable to start those relationships though because they can be hard. Different cultures come with different perspectives and different perspectives often expose our own faults and challenge us to grow in ways most of us feel uncomfortable growing.


On Jian Ghomeshi And The Acceptability Of Sexualized Violence Against Women | Sarah Bessey
How dare we make light of the very real terror and horror that women have endured and are enduring? You talk to a woman who has been raped or sexually violated or beaten or abused and then try to tell me that it’s okay to be turned on by that. It is NOT okay. It is never okay, it never will be okay. Violence against women is epidemic and evil, it’s not to be mined for sexual pleasure. How dare we forget our sisters? How dare we make light of or sexualize for our own pleasures the unmitigated horror that is endured by women even at this moment? Whether in the context of a classroom power dynamic or a war torn refugee camp, women are preyed upon, groomed for abuse and abused in horrifying numbers in this way from the youngest to the oldest. There are women who believe they deserve to be treated in this way – think about that for a second.

I’m Pregnant. So Why Can’t I Tell You? | Medium
From what I can gather, this code of silence is meant to protect you, the pregnant woman, from the (supposed) shame of reporting back to your community that this pregnancy is not to be. Since this early stage is deemed the most risky, tradition holds that it’s best to conceal your pregnancy from everyone, and to present it to the world once you are (again, supposedly) no longer in danger, no longer puking or exhausted, with a bump and a glow to show for it.








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